Dear Future Me,
I thought it would be a good idea to start writing to you. I always have these thoughts of things I hope you remember: things I want you to do as a father, things I want to see changed in you, thoughts we need to erase from our present.
Everyone always says things like, “I will never let my kid be that way!” or “When I get older I will be better than that.” So I decided, to make this easier on myself, I would write to you and let you know what you should and shouldn’t do. Or at least try to (not) do. So, here’s part one.
Please do your best to not let your son be like the boys we have today. Don’t let him be like you were in high school, and especially not like the boys in high school today.
I have noticed that our culture seems to have less and less of a moral compass. We have lost the sense of decency, respect for one another, and a filter. As I sit and listen to conversations of today in our youth, and even in some adults, I am constantly disgusted with the conversations going on. Especially from boys, I have never heard such vulgar talk.
I once heard Andy Stanley say, “Your present will soon become your past. And later, your past will present itself in your future.” A confusing sentence if you read it incorrectly, but that was his goal. He wanted to make you think. He wanted to sound confusing so you would think it was a deep thought.
Essentially he is saying to be careful what you do, day in and day out. Make each day count. Watch your words, be mindful of your actions, and be respectful with your thoughts. So I wanted to write to you and tell you the aspirations I have for our future son.
Make him a gentlemen. Trust me, they are hard to find. It amazes me the looks I get when I do something nice for someone. Sometimes people don’t care at all. Whether they are not conscious of what’s going on around them, or they just don’t care. But occasionally, just occasionally, you see someone who realizes what you’ve done and is truly grateful.
Teach him how to be respectful in every area. He must learn to respect females, or he will be doomed to the same fate that the average MS and HS boy has. That means it has to start in the mind. Our thoughts are seeds, and every action of our body is the result of those seeds. Teach him to never look lustfully, to never speak with vulgarity, to respect each female as his mother/sister. If not, we know the repercussions of ignorance.
Let him know the mistakes you made, and tell him up front. Don’t wait until he messes up, or be afraid to start the conversation “too soon”. Chances are, the conversations have already started at school. They say, “boys will be boys.” But don’t let him. Boys may be boys, but train your son to be a man from the beginning. You know the scars of childish thinking.
Teach him how to have a relationship and an understanding that Jesus Christ is alive. That HE is with us each and every day. Not as a creepy watchmen, but as a loving Father. Show him in scripture the ways of a mature man. Show him that he is strong, that he is a warrior, that he is a mighty man of God, a man of Valor. But also show him that he has to be strong enough to cry. A tough man takes every pain and acts as if it never happened. But a strong man shows his weaknesses and isn’t afraid to cry.
There is so much more I want to share with you, but I know your attention span and 700 words is pushing it for one sitting. Don’t worry self, there will be more letters. Just remember this:
Above all else, pray that our son does not act like you did.
And I will pray that from this day forward I will grow, and be strong enough to be the father you need to be. Love you, but not as much as Kanye loves Kanye.